And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize
