Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
