Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Randomize
