i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
