Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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