Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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