just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
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