It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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