i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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