I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
