Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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