Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
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