wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I understand Curling. That high.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize