Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
