D3 body, D1 cock
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
