Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
