Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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