Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize