I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Randomize
