Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
