I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
