I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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