Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
