You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
