So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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