I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
