she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
