sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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