i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
