He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
He kissed a someone with a penis
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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