i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
