i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
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