Quick, to the slutcave!
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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