please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
