dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
You almost got us killed.
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