I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
