mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
