Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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