im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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