Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
sex in a hospital.. check
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
