you would pick up someone in the library
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
