I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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