ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
