Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
