What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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