I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
