I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
