I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
