I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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