I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
